December 6, 2010

Shush? No one is listening anyhow!

On December 1st - 1 week ago - I posted my controversial posting "time to get your head out of your ass" on both the SOSA Facebook page and Members only Facebook page. The post called into question the authenticity of the group and its members. 

Here is My soon to be deleted post?

The irony lays in their posted statement - their mission statement if you will:
"We want to put an end to the silence...."
My assumption/purpose of setting up a Facebook page is to spread your escapement of potential "sexual abuse survivors" and I do think Facebook is a great place for people to log into a site for support and the potential to get them more positively involved with their own healing. Well I don't know about you, but that's the reason why I joined. The fact that no one, and I mean no one, has even deleted my post (which has been published now for nearly a week) says a lot. 

It says a lot about the group itself. You want help? Well you've come to the wrong place. Someone to talk to, support you? Wrong again my friend. No, there is no one there to even monitor if someone was to need immediate help or support. There's no one there to even delete posts that might make you think the group is crap. Anyone can join. Anyone. And they post what they jolly well like and if you don't like what they post - gee, let me think - like a defensive child molester for one - no one is going to care cause no one monitors their site to ensure your safety.

Is this really what you pay your annual membership fees for?


  1. I don't want to be a member of SOSA any more. I don't want them to hold personal information about me. I don't want to give them any more money. I feel unsafe with those people and I don't trust them.

    They are aware of all this hullaballoo, surely, yet they've given no explanation or reassurance for the members. I've had no communication whatsoever to let me know what's really going on with the president and the board. I don't like reading all this stuff and knowing that I'm a member of this "support group". (A more accurate term is "investors".) I want the board to behave professionally and to contact us all to let us know what is going on and to reassure us that the group leaders we've put our trust in do care. But they don't and I want out.

    I wish I'd never got involved or sent them my details and money. But if I resign, what happens? Will I get flamed online? Will they send me horrible emails/letters? Will I need support systems in place just to withdraw from SOSA? Ironic!

  2. I deleted SOSA's link yesterday, thank goodness I never got around to joining.
    Thanks for the enlightenment Jax.

  3. My experience with SOSA has been nothing but supportive, informative, informing and empowering. I feel grateful for everything they have done for me and I am feeling really really sad about these troubles because I know people are hurting over it all. I too am scared I will get some negative attention from this side posting here. Its sad that survivors are fearing each other. To be honest I think that the people at SOSA have big hearts and really care about survivors and want to do what's best. I don't know all the in's and out's of this argument but I have read everything you have posted on your blog about it - and - i still think the bottom line is SOSA is really trying to help people and to protect survivors. I found what you wrote about DID quite saddening because there is so much misunderstanding around this and it doesn't need to be fueled by more misunderstanding. I just wish we could spend more time trying to support, understand and accept each other.

  4. As an outsider looking in, I find all of this really scary.

    You can tell a great deal about an organsiation/person by the way they react to things. One telling factor to me was the way that SOSA has shut down all communication. I'm not a member, so I can no longer comment on the SOSA blog. This is the only "healing" blog that I've encountered from an organisation that doesn't allow open commenting. When I tried to join the site in order to comment on the blog, I was told that only paid members of SOSA could join due to safety concerns.

    So apparently, I'm not safe because I didn't pay fees to an organisation. That is the message I got from this correspondence from a faceless/nameless "SOSA". It doesn't encourage me to want to join either, as it's not particularly welcoming.

    If they were worried about safety, they could use comment moderation. If the people running the blog are so easily triggered, that they can't handle comments and spam from non-SOSA people, then they shouldn't be running the blog.

    I had held back joining SOSA because of trust issues. It unfortunately looks as if those trust issues were well founded.

    Take care,

  5. Hey Anonymous above. What have you received for you membership fee?

  6. It was a small fee and i was happy to contribute in some way after going to the summit. I was happy to help ( in a very small way) to support activities like this. I didn't really see it as was I personally was getting I thought I had the opportunity to be apart of something and to help create things like the summit. Funding something like the summit i imagine wouldn't be easy and I felt so empowered and supported there. That's enough for me - I went - it helped - I want to help it happen again next year.

  7. That is interesting Castorgirl. I wonder how paying a membership fee keeps members safe? Most blogs don't charge you to comment on them. Very odd indeed! It is also interesting how the person writing the blog is 'faceless' as you put it, just signed as SOSA! Do these posts represent the opinions of all the SOSA members? I very much doubt it (and certainly not from the comments written from their latest blog). So in such cases shouldn't the author sign their own name, or make up a blog name,.... unless they believe they are SOSA and it's all about one persons ego?!

  8. That will be $2.00 for that comment thanks Alex - feel safer?

  9. Mmmm!!! has gone rather quiet hasn't it!!!

  10. Yep! We've said what we need to say, so the ball has been hit into SOSA's court and has simply stayed there. I would've thought there'd be some accountability, some need to explain what's happening to SOSA's members, who are often vulnerable and unable to deal with difficult social/interpersonal situations like this without help. I'd like to think that professional therapists feel an ethical compulsion to check that the survivors they come into contact with are (really and truly) safe. SOSA should be in no doubt that some members have experienced unnecessary harm and traumatisation as a result of interactions with their organisation. There MUST be some responsibility! I just can't fathom why at the very least reputations aren't being protected, even if they don't care about the real people behind these comments. Come on, SOSA, put your sweatband on and play ball.

  11. I am wondering what kind of accountablity they need. I wonder if there is anything in the Charitable trust thingy that has ethical dilemmas like this? The thing is I'm am not sure that much more can be done. As far as the hui is concerned the advocate told me that we all went down as surivivores. So not sure if there's any conbat on that. We were not therpist client and so in that context nothing can be done. But in the context of them being
    president and vice president, maybe something can be done. It would nice for SOSA to keep going but I'm worried that if they stay on the board no accountability will come about. Unless there is something that states that a president and vice president to should act a certain way and stop any excalation of what happened at the hui happening at all. thats all I am wondering about at the moment.

  12. The agenda for the SOSA AGM is out. It has three lines:

    - SOSA – where to from here
    - Appointment of new board members
    - The next summit

    Conspicuous by their absence are matters such as correspondence and finances. And aren't board members normally nominated, seconded and then voted for rather than "appointed"? Hmm...

  13. Board members nominated? PMSL... I wasn't! I applied and thought "it" would go through its usual voting stuff but I was the only one who applied and was accepted. So in there lies answer number one.

    New board members huh? New clients more like....

    The next summit? LMAO. Shame, it could have been good. I have since focused all my efforts on those more substantiated within the feild cause then I know, the effect will be the same. I suggest others do the same.

  14. so is the next summit that was planned for march not happening? what does LMOA mean? it will be really sad if its not happening.

  15. I hardly think so. Gudrun is apparently nursing a ill family member and the "other" prominent Board figure is in a psych unit (apparently)... Yes it is sad that it may not be going ahead but it also good that people, even with the best intentions, realise their limitations and also come to learn that starting (promising) a group such as SOSA means having strong leadership. The point of my exposing SOSA was for SOSA to also realise that if the structure, the foundation (those board members etc) are so ill they cannot function, that putting ALL the responsibility on those they said they would help is bloody unfair, incredulous, unprofessional, and downright rude! SOSA has turned out EXACTLY how I predicted it would.

    LMAO means Laugh my ass off.


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