April 29, 2010

Toilet seats...

Stop laughing. This is a very serious topic alright! We all have them. We've all sat on one at least once today yeah? So yeah, then they kind of deserve to be mentioned as normally as one would, say...hazard a conversation about kitchen knives. Good Lord, have I just made some kind of weird Freudian connection there? Moving along... 

I actually bought a new toilet seat today. Hooray! You would be saying that too if ever were unfortunate enough to have visited our great domain prior to the new throne seat - the man eating thing that it was, only in this household, it was a woman eating thing. 

It had a screw missing. yeah I know, a real simply 'handi-man' job for anyone to fix, except for those who are neither handy nor male -  I get "let off" on both counts.  Anyway, off with the old nasty plastic white toilet seat and on with the patterned one with the additional asset of foam. Yes, you heard right. A foam toilet seat! Next I'll be wanting one of those electric slippers (where you put both feet in the one bit) or, and I have seen these, an electric fleece outer duvet suit. Yep, a suit! A place for you arms and legs and maybe even your house keys! Ah, you just got to love household gadget stuff.. anyway, back to toilet seat. 

Ours now has foam. If you can get passed those childhood memories of "crusties" in rest homes and padded seats that we all deemed as a sign of pending death, then this is the latest thing in comfort known to mankind. It is a lot softer to sit on, admittedly. It is also a lot less horrifying than those nights when you toddle pipped off to the toilet, left the light off cause you know, you're considerate like that, only to find said (soon to be ex) boyfriend had left the lit up and you, in the dark, find yourself being shafted into a dark and icy cold abyss - otherwise known as "the bog." Oh God, I am getting sidetracked... I did say this was a girlie house, didn't I? 

So right... I highly recommend these cushioned seats. As far as I can tell so far, the only downside is that rush of squished air that happens as your butt plummets on the seat, which can be a good thing, and then that, not so flattering bum imprint you leave behind when you stand up. I always think it's wise to wait until the seat has returned to its former glory before exiting the toilet. It could be giving just a little too much away for the next guest if you know what I mean.... 


  1. ah.... the comfort of the little room.
    Toilet seats is definitely part of the call of nature!(Conserve toilet paper... use both sides!... is the sticker on the back of the door)
    Our previous toilet seats must have been distant cousins .
    Mine was a yellow one.. with a screw missing,that made it a bit of a roller coaster ride, with it's slip to one side motion, that occurred at the crucial moment.. with the added bonuses of rough scratches that had been made from putting the lid down to clamber up to change the light bulb....... (reach up dangle on one foot....hot and cold sweats when you nearly arse over)... and a crack in this scratched ,yellow , ancient toilet seat. This scratch had a wicked sense of humour... it pounced on soft flesh or unmanicured fluffy bits.. and wouldnt let go till you yelled "Uncle"
    it had to go...
    For 20 years ..my fetish for all things in varnished wood..had deeply desired a wooden toilet seat...
    after consulting with the plumber and bank manager .. it was decided by me, that if we were talking big bikkies to upgrade my toilet system because of gravity fed water supply and the septic tank connection being a tricky thing to realign... and parts very hard to find or adapt....etc....
    My Little girls room...Now, has a Wooden Toilet Seat and a Wooden Toilet Paper Holder in it now.. and hopefully its surroundings will be a relaxing Purple colour in the near future ... :-)

  2. Ah, you're a simple delight my dear friend. I so had a visual on all your just wrote and I'm still smiling. See, I knew this "toilet talk" would bring people out from the shadows....purple, you say. Putting that on my wish list, for you, that is. Sensing a good reason for a sleep over. Purple toilet room painting...hopefully, with paint. Thanks for posting hun.

  3. The comfort and the safe seating of a toilet seat is very important. We bought a beaut once, very expensive, with lovely dolphins swimming in a sea of blue, but do you think it would stay put, the nuts kept coming loose and allowing the thing to twist sideways, so it was biffed out in disgust one day.
    I really do hate men who leave the seat up to catch those nocturnal visits by half asleep women.
    Enjoy your foaming new seat, may you get many comfortable hours sitting on her.

  4. Getting off the toilet seat for the moment... (people dont always know that they visit the loo with me when i am on the phone,but .... taking all you guys with me ...on this ..is a mission even I am not going to do!)((whats SKYPE again Jax?))
    Jax.. do you remember "Work Day's at College?... the afternoon you and i were sent to paint a fence... at a beach residence?..
    try these memory pusher's : Painted Hand Prints on selected regions of our work clothes.... painted grass.... and oopsy paint fell down the hill... man with cookies and cordial ...not impressed.... giggling teenage girls got a whole hour up their sleeves before due back .....


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